The news from outside is not so good. People in America...have you lost your collective minds? Hoarding? News media freaking out? Please take a deep breath. Better yet take a long walk.
Yesterday morning we heard that Princess, Viking and a couple of other lines had cancelled all cruises. We were very happy then when the captain came on to make his daily 12:30 p.m. update on weather and location. After telling us the weather, he announced that HAL is currently planning to keep cruising, including us. That was great news. I really dread hearing that they're going to stop the cruise in Australia and fly us home. If they do have to end the cruise at some point, I'm very hopeful that we'll sail back to Florida, where I can just drive home.
Yesterday afternoon during happy hour and trivia we had quite the view. We were off the coast of Australia, cruising over the Great Barrier Reef. We can't really see any sea life but the water color is varied because of differences in depth. And, there are a lot of small islands and sandbars. It was the sky, though, that was most spectacular. Lots of clouds, some of them dropping huge amounts of rain. It was a great way to spend a few hours in the Crow's Nest, chatting and enjoying the view.
Now, as a public service, I'd like to explain how elevators work. There seems to be some confusion about boarding/leaving elevators or what to do while on board. Please read carefully and follow these rules.
- If you want to get on an elevator, press either the up arrow or the down arrow. If you don't press a button an elevator will eventually arrive but you're not allowed to complain about how long it took. And please don't press both the up/down buttons so that an elevator will arrive more quickly. That just slows down two elevators.
- After pressing the button, step to one side. When you see that an elevator doors are opening WAIT UNTIL PEOPLE GET OFF before you shove your way on. It will keep me from punching you in the throat and spending time in the ship's brig. If you aren't paying attention and start on before letting people off, a simple "sorry" or "excuse me" will keep you from being bitch slapped.
- When there are several people waiting to get in, please follow the example of the older men on the ship. Let the ladies and most infirm/elderly get on first. If you happen to be a ship's dancer (they are the worst about this) don't shove your way on first because you're young, agile and entitled. Let the 90 year old with a walker get settled first. And, if there is someone with a scooter and someone with a walker, let them go and take the next elevator.
- When your elevator arrives, that's not a good time to stand in the doorway and finish the conversation you were having with the person not getting on. The people already in the elevator don't want to hear about where you'll be meeting for drinks later. Decide that stuff before you push the button to call the elevator.
- When the elevator arrives and and you get on, do NOT immediately hit the "close door" button just because someone with mobility issues isn't able to get on as quickly as you'd like. Please remember that you, too, may be limping on a cane sometime. Sooner than you think if I see you do it because I'll kick you in the knee.
- Once you're on the elevator, choose one button to press. Going to the Lido? Press 8. We really don't care to visit 5, 6 and 7 because you can't decide where to go. Or because you are leaning against the buttons.
- Here's a fun tip for those unaccustomed to elevators. If the elevator is full and you are closest to the door, please step off even if it is not your floor to let the people in the back off. Trust us, we'll let you back on. Did bullies kick you off the elevators in grade school? Were elevators even invented then? Seriously, it is so much easier to just take two steps out/to the side to let people off rather than everyone trying to squirm around in a crowded elevator so the people in the back can get off.
- While on the elevator, please try to remember that rule about coughing into your elbow. Because when you spray your germs over everyone sharing that space, looks won't kill but someone might.
- When you're carrying beverages, please take care not to slosh them on your fellow passengers. Unless it's a cocktail. In that case, feel free to slosh it toward my mouth.
- Lastly, when you do break any of these rules, please use those words our mommies taught us: "I'm sorry. " Thank you." "Excuse me." We have all been distracted or just not paying attention and done all these things, myself included.
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